Date: June 14, 2020

Season 2, Episodes 1, 2, and 3

Musical Accompaniment: iTunes on shuffle, lots of Warped Tour albums.

Interstellar News: This was really a three-part season opener, so I’m treating it as one big episode. Also, absolutely nothing new happened in the opening credits.

Favorite Quotes:

Sage Sisko: “It’s based on a legend. And legends are as powerful as any truth.”

Doctor’s Orders: “Will somebody please explain this conversation to me?” and “Nobody could have planned this.”

Dax, She’s Too Old For You Bro: “Great. Seat of the pants technology.”

Kick-ass Kira: “With your eyes, Lieutenant, not your pants. Just point at them and fire.”

Quick Summary:

“I had done nothing but shoot an unarmed Cardassian in his underwear“: Quark gives Kira a Bajoran earring that was smuggled off Cardassia IV and proves Li Nalas is still alive. Since the Cardassians were supposed to have released all Bajoran prisoners Kira goes on a rescue mission with O’Brien. Kira and O’Brien find an entire labor camp and free most of it. To everyone’s surprise Cardassia issues a formal apology for not knowing such things still existed and Li just wants to rest. Li tries to stow away on a ship to the Gamma Quadrant and tells Sisko the real story of how he killed Gul Zarale. On the station, Jake has a date with a Bajoran girl and graffiti pops up with the symbol of a group called “The Circle” who want all non-Bajorans out of Bajor. Quark is branded by The Circle and Jake’s date is called off because her father didn’t like that Jake is a human. Minister Jaro makes Li a Navarch and makes him the Bajoran liaison officer on DS9, Kira is recalled to Bajor, and the first episode ends.

“How can you be chatting about skin lotion at a time like this?“: Sisko is angry about losing Kira and not being consulted, but he’s assured she earned a promotion. The Circle has gained a considerable amount of power and have even branded Sisko’s quarters. As Kira is packing she is interrupted several times as the other officers and Quark come to say goodbye, but it’s Vedek Bareil inviting her to the monastery. On Bajor, Bareil shows Kira an Orb and she has a weird and sort of sexy vision of her and Bareil. Sisko also beams down to visit with General Krim and fills him in on what he knows and then visits Kira, who is promptly abducted by The Circle and we find out it’s leader is Jaro.

On the station Odo deputizes Quark in order to find out where the weapons are coming from and more about The Circle. After searching the Kressari ship and coming up empty, Odo stows away as a rat and finds out it’s the Cardassians who are supplying the Kressari because they want the Federation to leave so they can take back control. Quark has found out where The Circle’s headquarters are so everyone leaves on a rescue mission and they leave Dax in charge. They are able to rescue Kira and get proof of Cardassian involvement but communication to Bajor is cut off and the Federation is ordered to evacuate as war ships will be there in several hours. Minister Jaro and Vedek Winn make an alliance and we end the second episode.

“And if our fathers couldn’t break us up, no stupid French thing will either”: Sisko gathers the Starfleet officers at Ops and explains how he’s staying so, of course, everyone else starts to figure out how to delay their evacuation so they can stay as well. Nog and Jake will be on separate ships, Keiko is upset with O’Brien for not coming with her and Molly, and Rom sells Quark’s seat to a Dabo girl. Li gives a wonderful speech to all of the Bajorans who are left on station and I can see why everyone wants him to be a leader. General Krim, Colonel Day, and the Bajoran military arrives to an empty DS9 because everyone is hiding in the conduits and eating combat rations. There are several sneak attacks against the military all of which work out in favor of Sisko.

Dax and Kira hitch a ride to one of the moons to find a ship that barely works, but they’ve got to deliver the proof to Bajor. They crash land but are saved by Vedek Bareil’s people and Dax appears just like she did in Kira’s vision earlier. Kira delivers the proof to the ministers and it’s clear that Vedek Winn and Minister Jaro’s alliance is finished when Winn realizes she was going to be on the losing side. They get word to DS9 where Krim and Li had already talked, so Kirm yells at Day and says it’s over. Unfortunately the writers remembered Kira has to come back so they have Day shoot at Sisko and Li is shot and killed protecting him, and dying as a martyr for Bajor. The episode ends with the families returning to the station.

My Thoughts and Impressions: I absolutely love Quark and Odo, they are fantastic together. O’Brien and Kira make a wonderful team and are very good at undercover work. Normally O’Brien is all mumbles when women are involved but he acted like a fine pimp when he and Kira were trying to bribe the Cardassian guard. Kira is a spitfire and I love it. I will admit I gasped when Kira was replaced at Ops, but I also called Li getting killed right after that moment… so there’s that. The first episode was absolutely the most gripping and I’m glad I was told this was a three part premiere.

When Kira is packing I had a flashback to Picard trying to play his flute in “A Fistful of Datas” and being continually interrupted, put it was wonderfully played by everyone in the room. I immediately liked General Krim but thought he would see reason and see that Sisko was an honorable man, but it shows just how easy people in power can sway even the most even headed of people. Kira in the monastery was relatable because I am the worst at arts and crafts, just ask any of my sorority sisters. She’s so honored to be in the presence of an orb and also super embarrassed about being naked with the Vedek, it’s an interesting side to her. Jaro does an amazing job of being a pompous ass, especially when he uses Cardassian torture methods on Kira… coincidence or maybe he knew? I also loved how Odo became the damn label on the box O’Brien put in the ship in order for him to snoop. Sisko is a bit on the sly side when he asks O’Brien how much time it would take to evacuate EVERYTHING, not just the people.

O’Brien’s love of combat rations is fantastic. Bashir is 1000% less annoying and ridiculous and he delivers all of his lines over all three episodes quite fantastically. Odo is fantastic here where he’s popping out of walls, turning into trip wires, and generally being the kind of alien I want on my side of a fight. The whole “rag tag underdog group of fewer people” thing was very much like every other episode of this type I ever watched. The military had to do things just so in order for the traps to work, but military is nothing but by-the-book, so maybe that was for the best. While the third episode wasn’t as strong as the first two, it certainly made for an amazing opening story line and wrapped up the things it needed to. Overall I am now super excited about Season 2 and look forward to the next few months of DS9. Lumping all three episodes together, I’d give a rating of 8 space stations with 5 of them at the mouth of a wormhole.

TA Out!

Date: June 13, 2020

Season 1, Episodes 17, 18, and 19

Musical Accompaniment: Pirates of the Caribbean music, from Ambient Worlds

Interstellar News: I made a giant vat of marinara sauce, my Grandpa Freddy’s famous garlic meatballs, and cried a lot about technology not working today. Also, I FINISHED SEASON 1… in a WEEK!

Favorite Quote from “Dramatis Personae”:

Kira: I know that none of us were really responsible for our actions, but I feel like I owe you an apology.

Sisko: For attempted mutiny.

Kira: Well, yes.

Sisko: I think we’ll let it go. This time.

Kira and Sisko have such a great chemistry as work partners.

So what had happened in “Dramatis Personae” was…: Kira and Sisko are at odds over a Valerian ship docking but are interrupted by a Klingon ship coming through the wormhole early, the ship exploding, and the sole surviving crew member who beamed over says “Victory” and then also dies. Quark and Odo are talking when Odo literally flips inside out and wakes up fine, but Bashir is acting strangely. In fact everyone is acting strangely and taking sides, it’s the Bajorans vs. the Federation – though not everyone is divided so evenly.

Odo figures out that some telepathic archive the Klingon brought on board is causing everyone (but him because, well, he doesn’t have a humanoid brain) to reenact a power struggle, so he cons Bashir into developing the cure in order to get a “leg up” on the others. Odo then plays the other two sides like a two-dollar banjo and, once everyone is in Cargo Bay 4, he activates the solution and spaces the energy matrix. Oh, and Sisko built a clock… maybe that will be important later.

…”Welcome back, everybody”: This entire episode I kept going “this is not okay” or “that’s weird” until I started to catch onto what Odo was doing. I realized that Odo is basically Data who saves the station because he’s not a humanoid. Clearly the beings who populated the universe in “The Chase” were wrong to do so because humanoids are susceptible to all kinds of ridiculousness. Also, more of the ship should have been effected but there weren’t as many people in the cargo bay… or did they deal with them later once senior ops were under control. Everyone did such a great job acting differently than their usual character, and I actually liked this Bashir a little better. I didn’t quite understand what Dax was doing, but O’Brien is absolutely the man I want on my side if I’m choosing. Everyone went a little manic and I totally bought the conspiracy mindset they were all thinking. Also, Quark gets thrown into the bar by Kira and it was fantastic… poor Quark. Props to Odo who earned himself at least 6 hours in his bucket for this one, he skillfully played them all.

Favorite Quote from “Duet”:

Marritza: I have to be punished. We all have to be punished. Major, you have to go out and tell them I’m Gul Darhe’el. It’s the only way.

Kira: Why are you doing this?

Marritza: For Cardassia. Cardassia will only survive if it stands in front of Bajor and admits the truth. My trial will force Cardassia to acknowledge its guilt. And we’re guilty, all of us. My death is necessary.

Kira finally understanding why he’s doing all of this.

So what had happened in “Duet” was…: A freighter hails DS9 as one of its passengers requires medical attention for Kalla-Nohra, a disease so rare it could only be contracted if after a mining accident at a labor camp named Gallitep. Kira goes to pay her respects, having liberated the camp and seeing the aftermath, but finds a Cardassian named Marritza and holds him for war crimes as the horrors of war return to her. Sisko goes to find out who this man really is but Bashir proves Marritza is lying. Sisko’s in an awkward place between Bajor and Cardassia but allows Kira to take charge in interrogation.

The background investigation shows the man resembles Gul Darhe’el, the Butcher of Gallitep, but a deeper probe shows he really was just the file clerk Marritza who finally couldn’t stand the guilt of being a bystander. He put his affairs in order, had plastic surgery to look more like Darhe’el, and flew to DS9 in order to be captured and pay for his crimes. Kira, thankfully, knows they need more Cardassians like him if the two sides are ever going to move forward. Unfortunately, on his way out, Marritza is stabbed by a Bajoran who is of the opinion that being Cardassian is crime enough and punishable by death.

…”Nothing justifies genocide”: So the guy who plays Marritza/Darhe’el is the same man who played Judge Wexler in Ghostbusters II (which I have made reference to a bunch over TNG and now DS9) and he plays his part BEAUTIFULLY in both the movie and this episode. He has me, and Kira, believing that he’s just some innocent Cardassian clerk and then that he’s an infamous Gul until he ultimately breaks down that he just feels someone should own up and tell the damn truth. This was such a powerful episode for so many reasons. We see that, in war, there aren’t always the “good” and the “bad”. Kira is asked how many Cardassians she killed, soldiers or civilians, and she doesn’t answer but explains her people were just defending themselves. It really thrusts me into today’s conflict with all that the Black community has gone through, yet some people will only ever see the color of their skin and not what is underneath. Humans, Bajorans, and Cardassians come in all shapes and sizes and from all walks of life, they aren’t all inherently evil just because one country invaded the other.

While Kira and Marritza dominate most of the screen time, the others help move the story along to see if it’s just Kira not being able to see past her prejudice or if it’s really something more. Odo plays Gul Dukat just as easily as he played the senior officers last episode in order to see some paperwork, Sisko handles everyone to make sure this thing doesn’t get out of hand, and Bashir provides the medical surety that is needed to prove who the Cardassian is. I absolutely hate how the episode ended, but understand why it did. In fact it drives the point home more for Kira that now she needs to think about healing and not just being mad at Cardassia forever. This deserves a 10, but I’m mad at the ending still so it’s 9.5 containers of vodka sauce. The ending, however, will not stop me from adding it to my ongoing list of favorite episodes and other ranked things.

Favorite Quote from “In the Hand of Prophets”:

Bareil: The Prophets teach us patience.

Sisko: It appears they also teach you politics.

Sisko is sassy to whomever he pleases, thank you very much.

So what had happened in “In the Hand of Prophets” was…: Keiko is teaching her class about the wormhole when Vedek Winn comes into her class and says Keiko is teaching blasphemy. There’s the whole “separation of church and school” argument that happened (and still happens) here in America. Keiko refuses to back down as she’s not prohibiting religion but it seems religion won’t tolerate education.

O’Brien and Neela are looking for a tool and happen to find it and their missing Ensign reduced to a puddle in one of the tubes. Bashir finds the Ensign was killed and O’Brien finds odd security holes. There’s an explosion at the school, thankfully no one is hurt, and Vedek Bareil comes to try to unite the two sides. We find out it’s all a ply by Winn, who has Neela working for her, and Neela attempts to assassinate Bareil. Kira, who knows everything, figures it out and realizes the Bajorans need to do a little more give with the Federation.

…”Be careful who you share your jumja with”: What turns out to be Keiko giving O’Brien shit and keeping him on his toes was actually a very perceptive bit of foreshadowing that you should always check your assistant’s work. As a teacher I completely understand Keiko and back her up. I was raised Catholic so I went to Sunday School on top of my K – 8 public education. I learned my religious stuff on Sundays and my life stuff throughout the week and if I needed to reconcile them I discussed with my parents or friends. I was sent to Catholic High School, which was ridiculous, and didn’t feel like there was as much diversity. It makes sense as public school give you a broad view of the world and private school zooms in to the one view that they like best. I’m also glad that Kira saw right through what was happening and it eventually led to a better understanding between her and Sisko. I also loved that I got a real season finale and not a cliffhanger of various strength. A bit of a rocky first season, but I enjoyed it and this episode… 7 jumja lollipops.

TA Out!

Date: June 12, 2020

Season 1, Episodes 14, 15, and 16

Musical Accompaniment: Some Disney piano music

Interstellar News: I think I’ve finally kicked the sinus infection, but this damn cough… ugh!

Favorite Quote from “Progress”:

Sisko: You know, you’re causing a lot of trouble.

Mullibok: I can’t tell you how delighted I am to hear it.

Sisko has finally met his match in sass.

So what had happened in “Progress” was…: Two big things are happening around DS9: Jake and Nog have an idea and Bajor is attempting their first large-scale energy transfer.

Jake and Nog are playing cards and overhear that Quark has a surplus of yamok sauce that, apparently, only Cardassians like. They make a deal with a man to trade the sauce for his 100 self-sealing stem bolts (whatever those are). They find the Bajoran who was originally supposed to buy the bolts and trade him the bolts for seven tessipates of land, as Jake is adamant that land is good. Back at Quark’s, Odo is curious if Quark knows anything about this “No-Jay Consortium” who owns this last piece of land Bajor needs in order to build a facility. The boys, proud of their work, are finally about to profit.

Dax and Kira are out doing a final sweep of the moon that’s about to be tapped for energy when they read three lifeforms, so Kira beams down and is surrounded by two farmers straight out of Rocky Horror. Turns out they work for Mullibok, the farmer, who is in no hurry to leave. Kira decides to stay and try to talk some sense into him, to no avail. She brings some security guards who, during a kerfuffle, stun Mullibok… so she stays again to help him heal and finish his kiln. Sisko beams down and has a “come to the Prophets” talk with her so she lets Mullibok light the kiln, she then phasers it, lights his cottage on fire, and requests from the transporter that there are “two to beam up”.

…”There was this big, ugly tree”: The Jake and Nog story was funny, adorable, and actually panned out for them in the end. I was curious where it was going to end up, and I wasn’t disappointed. In fact it took two teenage boys all of a few days to make a profit out of the yamok sauce that Quark thought was worthless… see what happens when you’re angry, you can’t feel your lobes tingle. It also is a good vehicle for showing the boys they have a lot to learn, like how to Google “what is a self-sealing stem bolt” and “what are they used for”.

Kira and Mullibok’s story, however, was really damn deep. It’s obvious Millibok has made a nice life for himself and he is one with the land. Doesn’t Kira remember saying “The land and the people are one” and now she’s trying to part this man from the land he’s been one with for the last 40 years? Unfortunately he’s not a starring role, so this story is all about her journey. She has to realize she’s part of the government now, and the government isn’t all bad when you’re on the other side… right? She’s been fighting her whole life for Bajoran independence, but these things take time, so when she doesn’t know what to do she’s still got to keep busy. It was for sure a breakthrough moment for her to help Mullibok build the kiln, have him but the last piece, and then put her foot down when he wants the suicide-by-moon option and burn it all down. I hate that there’s no resolution and I’m sure there won’t be a follow-up, but I’m glad Kira is realizing what she needs to do to achieve her goals. It’s a similar journey Data went on in “The Ensigns of Command“, except he got the people to see reason eventually. I truly liked both parts of the episode, 8 packets of yamok sauce for this one.

Favorite Quote from “If Wishes Were Horses”:

Odo: Ladies and gentlemen, and all androgynous creatures, your attention please! As you may have noticed, we’re experiencing some difficulties. I’m going to have to ask you all to please refrain from using your imaginations.

Quark: Just because you don’t have an imagination, don’t ruin it for the rest of us.

Odo believes gender is a social construct and I am all here for it! I can forgive him for his diatribe a few episodes back now. Also, Quark is good with the comeback lines.

So what had happened in “If Wishes Were Horses” was…: Quark is thinking about adding family-friendly holosuites, Bashir is striking out with Dax (I’m shocked I tell you), and O’Brien is brilliantly telling a bedtime story to Molly. Suddenly Rumpelstiltskin appears in Molly’s room, a very forward Dax is in Bashir’s room, and Buck Bokai (a baseball player) is following Jake around. Trying to figure out why people’s imaginations are manifesting in real life, the real Dax takes a reading and wonders if there’s a rupture in space. Dax and Bashir find out the Vulcans encountered an issue years ago, but it blew everything up. The three imagined beings conference together and things just got interesting.

The senior officers develop a plan and O’Brien shoots a bomb at the rift, but it does no good. Rumple asks O’Brien if he would sacrifice his daughter to save everyone and somehow it dawns on Sisko that they’re living the plot of “WNOHGB” and everyone has to believe that there’s nothing wrong and suddenly nothing is wrong. As he’s resting from the ordeal, Bokai comes to visit Sisko and explains they’re a species who was curious and they’re on a mission to encounter new life. Maybe they’ll be in touch in a year or so, maybe, but Bokai throws Sisko a baseball as a memento – and my husband tells me this is important.

…”But you haven’t told us anything about your species”: Good thing no one thought of the Stay Puft Marshmallow man! To be honest, I really thought it had something to do with Quark and his expansion of the holosuites but I was both happy and sad about the actual reasoning. On one hand it’s awesome that there are other species with the same mission as the Federation, but on the other hand it’s been done at least twice before in the episodes I linked to above. On a third hand, if you’re Arax for example, it was absolutely wonderful that the alien that took on the Buck Bokai persona totally leaned into all of the baseball analogies – though “Evolution” in TNG also had a baseball lover so there’s that. The very last one of my hands liked the DS9 spin on making thoughts come to life, but I am saddened by Kira’s thoughts being solely violent and terrifying for her.

I will give Bashir a bit of credit as he absolutely doesn’t want to do anything improper with Dax at first, this shows he has heard her on some level… but he’s still a lech. This also leads to a wonderful conversation between Dax and Bashir and hopefully he’ll stop being a lech. Poor Odo is trying to deal with snow and emu-like creatures, but he has a good laugh when Quark’s “women” are missing and all of his patrons are winning, it evened out in the end. I hope we get a follow up on this, even if it was just a “meh” episode. 5 horses for this episode, but bring your own saddle!

Favorite Quote from “The Forsaken”:

Odo: Commander, I have a problem.

Sisko: Quark again?

Odo: No, sir, this one’s named Lwaxana.

The whole damn conversation is hysterical… read the rest here.

The Complaint of the Changeling: “Procreation does not require changing how you smell, or writing bad poetry, or sacrificing various plants to serve as tokens of affection. In any event, it’s all irrelevant to me.”

So what had happened in “The Forsaken” was…: Bashir is at dinner with three ambassadors and he is certainly overwhelmed by their neediness when Lwaxana Troi exclaims something was stolen. Enter her shining white knight Odo who is able to thwart the thief and return her item. Meanwhile O’Brien is having an argument with the station’s Cardassian computer and an unidentified probe comes out of the wormhole.

Everything kind of happens at once. Lwaxana and Odo get stuck in a lift because the power went down because the probe keeps sucking energy out all over the station. Odo is absolutely horrified at being stuck with Lwaxana but also because he’s nearing his regeneration cycle. They wind up having a lovely chat and Lwaxana takes care of Odo, who now has his turn to be grateful. Bashir tries to get the ambassadors to go back to their rooms but a fire breaks out and he has to do some quick thinking. Thankfully they all survive it and the ambassadors gratefully call him “Julian” and exclaim they’ll let Starfleet know what an excellent officer they have. O’Brien realizes he’s got a puppy on his hand and goes off the deep end with that analogy and builds a “doghouse”, which is really a subprogram to house the probe’s information so it stops disrupting the station.

…”Keep it off the furniture”: Boy oh boy does Lwaxana Troi get better with age. If anyone could get Odo to soften a bit, it’s tenacious Troi. She’s back to her flirty self and Betazoid forwardness, and it’s a breath of fresh air for stuffy Odo. She shows him that you can allow others to care for you and it is nice to sometimes be taken care of, especially when you’re in good company. I also enjoyed the banter between O’Brien and the computer and it’s a typical engineer who knows something is wrong and his commanding officer kind of rolling his eyes and going “okay”, but Sisko knows he can trust his people no matter how ridiculous they sound. I do think O’Brien ripped his solution from Barclay’s “Ship in a Bottle“, but I did appreciate the puppy analogy follow through.

Speaking of puppy analogies, here’s one I give to my first year students. Two roommates have a puppy and a potted plant. The puppy tells them when he needs to be taken out, fed, needs attention, or is in pain. The potted plant, however, just sits there all nice and pretty in the window absolutely sure no one will forget about her because she’s so pretty. The puppy, however, gets a lot of attention and the roommates forget about the plant and she begins to wither. They suddenly realize she needs some attention so they begin to bring her back to life. I use this to illustrate that students need to advocate for themselves and not assume that their teachers know they are struggling or are in need of help. Sometimes it’s possible to nurse a plant back to health, but sometimes it’s too late and you have to start all over. This is true in life, as well, you should let others know when you need help… none of us are from Betazed. 7 subprograms and a pink wig for this episode.

TA Out!

Date: Jun 11, 2020

Season 1, Episodes 12 and 13

Musical Accompaniment: Medieval Celtic Music: the Druids of Combat

Interstellar News: I received a wonderful gift today and realized the world is really fucking small. Also, my face still hurts from sinus pressure.

Favorite Quote from “Battle Lines”:

Kira: A minor operative whose activities are limited to running errands for the terrorist leaders?

Sisko: Major, when you’re through feeling underappreciated, perhaps you’d join me in welcoming the Kai aboard.

Kira being pissed at the Cardassians for thinking she was Rocco and Sisko trying to help her focus on something more meaningful.

So what had happened in “Battle Lines” was…: Kai Opaka finally comes aboard DS9 and is eager to travel through the wormhole. Kai Opaka, Bashir, Kira, and Sisko travel through the wormhole and encounter some artificial satellites, but one attacks them and they crash land on a moon. Kai Opaka is killed and suddenly the three are surrounded by locals who explain that they are prisoners and are in a war with their sworn enemies. After a battle with said enemies, Kai Opaka emerges and everyone else who died in the last skirmish comes back to life. Bashir figures out they have been changes, but it’s tied to the terrain so no one who has been so altered can leave without dying.

Meanwhile, Dax and O’Brien are trying to search for their missing comrades. O’Brien, ever the MacGyver, figures out a way to trace the missing shuttle, makes sure they don’t get shot by the satellites, and works his transporter magic. Kai Opaka decides to stay and help those on the moon to heal and the others leave, hopefully with a reeeeeeeeeeally good explanation for the rest of the Bajoran faithful.

…”When you cease to fear death, the rules of war change.”: I absolutely love that Kira is pissed at the Cardassians for thinking she was not much of a threat and she reacts so perfectly, as does Sisko. Shel-la kind of reminds me of Stallone, AAAADRIAN anyone? I thought he might wind up being reasonable, but it was too much to ask in an hour long episode. I also got a lot of “LTBYLB” vibes. It was interesting to see how Bashir battled with his oath as a doctor and preserver of life to what was happening to these people on the moon. It was equally as interesting to hear Sisko interpret the Prime Directive and then snap at Bashir. Sometimes in a crisis Sisko will act like Picard and ask for options, but other times he makes a decision and by god you better get behind it. This was an interesting vehicle to keep Opaka “alive” but with the need for Bajor to elect/find/raise up a new religious leader. It was also good for Bashir to get his hands dirty, both rigging the computer and tackling the commander, in order to explain why an entire colony of prisoners didn’t just get beamed out of one quadrant to another. I’m sure this will be important later, 6 warm and comfortable blankets for this episode.

Favorite Quote from “The Storyteller”:

Quark: Let’s see, two Bajoran synthales, a glass of Gamzian wine, and a Trixian bubble juice for the little lady.

Varis: I’m not a little lady.

(Varis throws the drink in Quark’s face and storms out)

Quark: I’m still charging her for that drink.

So this isn’t quite as good as when Perry gets not one, but two drinks thrown in his face in MOONSTRUCK, but I’ll take it.

So what had happened in “The Storyteller” was…: This is a tale of two stories that have absolutely nothing to do with one another. Sisko and Kira deal with two parties who need a mediator while O’Brien and Bashir spend some quality time together.

Sisko and Kira meet with the representatives of the Paqu, a young woman named Varis, and the Navot, a middle aged man named Woban. Nog and Jake visit with Varis, though Nog acts more like Raj from The Big Bang Theory at first and he’s all verklempt when trying to talk in from of Varis. Eventually the boys help her to not only know Commander Sisko better but also to make a compromise that will shape her into an effective leader for her people. There’s also a funny bit that involves those three, a bucket, and some oatmeal.

O’Brien and Bashir have the world’s second most awkward shuttle conversation and land on Bajor for what turns out to be a fake emergency. The Sirah of the village is old and near the end of his life, but it’s up to him and him alone to help the people fight off the Dal’Rok that comes once a year. The Sirah musters up the stamina to do it on the fourth of five nights, but he cannot complete his mission so he has O’Brien take over and names him the new Sirah before he dies. Hovath, the old Sirah’s assistant, attacks O’Brien and then explains that he messed up and lost the people’s trust… but it really should be him that is the new Sirah. O’Brien kisses some babies and tries his hand at being Sirah, but thankfully Hovath bails him out and earns the trust of his people.

…”Okay, Juuuuulian”: I loved that Jake and Nog were able to help more than they realize and that they got the “Little Orphan Annie” treatment for their oatmeal stunt. They are typical mallrats who only have so many places they can go and things that take up their day, so they find the best place to people watch and to think. Odo, of course, does his best to keep them out of trouble… but teenagers will always get themselves into trouble. Their part of the story resonated with me because it can certainly be jarring for a young woman to suddenly be thrust into a situation and then judged for her age. She also has no support structure, from what we can tell, and that’s got to be hard. It was nice to see that she took some time to be a kid for a bit before she had to go rule for her people.

The other part of the story was just stupid, so so so so stupid. If the villagers really fell for this year after year, I just have no words for that level of stupidity. It’s not quite the scary smoke monster from Lost, it’s more like the shaving cream mess from The Blues Brothers 2000. It was fun to see O’Brien thrust into the spotlight and for him futz over the words when presented with three beautiful women, but leave the poor man alone. He just wants to do his job and head back home to Molly and Keiko. Bashir was actually not terrible in this episode, as he’s clearly having a lot of fun at O’Brien’s expense while also trying to get to know the man. He also helps Hovath summon the courage to lead his people and then smartly suggests to O’Brien they get the hell out of dodge. I was also quite fond of the way O’Brien enunciated “Julian” every time he said it, mostly so he could go back to calling him “sir”. I’m going with 4 blankets on this episode, but none of them have dragons on them.

TA Out!

Date: June 20, 2020

Season 1, Episodes 9, 10, and 11

Musical Accompaniment: Finishing the piano covers and then moving to cello covers.

Interstellar News: Woke up with a 100 degree fever and a sinus infection. Took it easy and feeling a bit better, but absolutely not my best.

Favorite Quote from “Move Along Home”:

Sisko: Major, I gave you a direct order.

Kira: Court-martial me.

Sisko: I can’t. You’re not in Starfleet.

Dax: If I were your superior officer, I’d court-martial both of you.

Just a really great exchange between the three.

So what had happened in “Move Along Home” was…: Sisko and Jake need to have “the talk” but it’s got to wait until tomorrow morning because Sisko is in charge of First Contact with the Wadi. The Wadi want to go straight to Quarks to gamble but when they see Quark swindling them, they show him a new game.

Sisko wakes up from a dream and he’s in a strange place with his uniform on, he’s also joined by Bashir, Dax, and Kira. Jake checks in with Odo because his dad is missing, and Odo berates Primmin for not being suspicious when none of the senior officers reported for duty. Soon Odo and Quark realize that the senior four are the pawns in the game and Quark is in charge of their well-being. In game they are facing obstacles, very much like the end of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, where they have to solve the puzzle before they can leave: hopscotch, having to drink before they choke to death, Bashir being moved out of the party, and ultimately trying to get out of a cave. They eventually all fall off the cliff and re-materialize in Quarks, unharmed, as they were never in any real danger.

…and then I found five dollars: Quark tries to convince Odo that he’s Kenny Rodgers, but alas you should never trust a gambler. This was an interesting concept and a less-than-textbook first contact situation, but it was cheapened at the end that no one was actually in danger. Maybe cheapened isn’t the word, but it took the sincerity of Quark’s breakdown right out. I do love that Odo blows on the dice and the Wadi are basically like “take me to your hookers and blow”, but those are the only redeeming things about this episode. 2 shaps for this game, Allamaraine!

Favorite Quote from “The Nagus”:

Nog: It happened in Quark’s. I put it on a table and there were some Vulcans nearby

O’Brien: Hold on. You’re saying Vulcans stole your homework?!

The oldest trick in the book, no matter what planet you’re from.

So what had happened in “The Nagus” was…: Sisko gets turned down by Jake because 14 year olds want to be with their friends rather than their parents, totally makes sense. The Godfather of the Ferengi, Grand Nagus Zek, comes to visit Quark and wants to hold a summit at the bar. He wants to lead the Ferengi into more lucrative ventures in the Gamma Quadrant, but he also wants to retire and names Quark as his successor – much to the chagrin of his son and all others at the bar. Soon after Zek dies and Quark’s life is threatened. Turns out Nog and Krax are trying to get Quark to sleep with the space fishes, but Zek is actually still alive and was testing his son… which failed miserably.

O’Brien is filling in for Keiko at school, poor substitute teacher O’Brien. Nog is told by his father that he’s got to stop going to school. This leads to a rift between Nog and Jake, but is later cleared up as Jake tutors Nog in his spare time. Sisko is the most adorable father as he’s all pissed and then realizes he raised a really good kid. Oh and Dax gets to eat some stew so it doesn’t go to waste.

…and then I found five dollars: As a teacher, I laughed a lot at the “Vulcans stole your homework” bit, probably more than I should. It’s wonderful that O’Brien is filling in while his wife is traveling and that there are a lot of students in the school now. It’s also adorably heartwarming that Jake realized he and Nog could still be friends despite their cultural differences. Nog will certainly have a leg up from other Ferengi if he can read and they cannot, for one. I am sad, however, that Jake didn’t want to see the Gratitude Festival… cause I kind of wanted to.

This was a great vehicle for us to see more of the Ferengi culture and Wallace Shawn was fantastic as Zek. It makes sense that the Ferengi want to expand their business to the new quadrant just as it makes sense that Zek wanted to retire. It was a little too convenient that he died, and I was pretty sure his son had done it until well Zek reappeared of course. Rom grows a pair and stands up to his brother, for which Quark is elated. Also the guy who was with Zek totally reminded me of Edward Scissorhands… right? Anyway, this was a fun little episode and I give it 7 rules of acquisition.

Favorite Quote from “Vortex”:

Odo: I think I finally figured out what crime you were found guilty of on your world.

Croden: What’s that?

Odo: You talked too much.

Odo with the snark and the sass.

So what had happened in “Vortex” was…: Quark and Odo discuss some of the new arrivals at the station, including a man named Croden and two twin Miradorns. The Miradorns have an object they want to sell but it’s likely stolen and Quark stalls them for a bit until Croden comes in and tries to get it from them. There’s a shoot out, Odo forms from a glass, and one of the twins dies. Dax and Sisko head to Croden’s planet but they don’t care about anything other than getting him back to pay for his crimes.

Croden alludes that he knows about changelings, Odo’s people, and shows him a necklace that has shifting capabilities. Odo is charged with taking Croden back to Rakhar, but the Miradorn follows them and they are forced to land where “Odo’s people are”, but it was all a lie. Croden was able to save his daughter and asks Odo to take her back, which he agrees. They fight off the Miradorn ship and are then hailed by a Vulcan vessel, so Odo has the idea to allow Croden and his daughter to be sent there.

…and then I found five dollars: I love that Odo is genuinely curious but truly puts his duty above all else, so it’s such a bummer that Odo doesn’t really get any answers to his ancestry. Croden is an interesting “bad guy”, especially because he wants to do the right thing and then doesn’t and then ultimately does because he knows leaving Odo behind just isn’t the right thing to do. The interesting twist is Croden does this all for the one child he could save and was really willing to fall on his sword so she could have a better life. Odo realizes that maybe a fresh start is what they both need, and maybe they’ll be happy on Vulcan or at least far away from the Gamma Quadrant. What I don’t understand is how Odo was knocked unconscious if he doesn’t really have a form. I also am curious why Quark was helping Croden in the first place and what significance the stolen object had, that’s all still a mystery. I didn’t hate this episode, but I didn’t love it either. 5 necklaces for Odo.

TA Out!