DS9: “Battle Lines” and “The Storyteller”

Date: Jun 11, 2020

Season 1, Episodes 12 and 13

Musical Accompaniment: Medieval Celtic Music: the Druids of Combat

Interstellar News: I received a wonderful gift today and realized the world is really fucking small. Also, my face still hurts from sinus pressure.

Favorite Quote from “Battle Lines”:

Kira: A minor operative whose activities are limited to running errands for the terrorist leaders?

Sisko: Major, when you’re through feeling underappreciated, perhaps you’d join me in welcoming the Kai aboard.

Kira being pissed at the Cardassians for thinking she was Rocco and Sisko trying to help her focus on something more meaningful.

So what had happened in “Battle Lines” was…: Kai Opaka finally comes aboard DS9 and is eager to travel through the wormhole. Kai Opaka, Bashir, Kira, and Sisko travel through the wormhole and encounter some artificial satellites, but one attacks them and they crash land on a moon. Kai Opaka is killed and suddenly the three are surrounded by locals who explain that they are prisoners and are in a war with their sworn enemies. After a battle with said enemies, Kai Opaka emerges and everyone else who died in the last skirmish comes back to life. Bashir figures out they have been changes, but it’s tied to the terrain so no one who has been so altered can leave without dying.

Zombie says "I don't always eat people, but when I do, I prefer brains."
This, my friends, are what we call a ZOMBIE.

Meanwhile, Dax and O’Brien are trying to search for their missing comrades. O’Brien, ever the MacGyver, figures out a way to trace the missing shuttle, makes sure they don’t get shot by the satellites, and works his transporter magic. Kai Opaka decides to stay and help those on the moon to heal and the others leave, hopefully with a reeeeeeeeeeally good explanation for the rest of the Bajoran faithful.

Kai Opaka hugging Major Kira
Sometimes you just need a good cry.

…”When you cease to fear death, the rules of war change.”: I absolutely love that Kira is pissed at the Cardassians for thinking she was not much of a threat and she reacts so perfectly, as does Sisko. Shel-la kind of reminds me of Stallone, AAAADRIAN anyone? I thought he might wind up being reasonable, but it was too much to ask in an hour long episode. I also got a lot of “LTBYLB” vibes. It was interesting to see how Bashir battled with his oath as a doctor and preserver of life to what was happening to these people on the moon. It was equally as interesting to hear Sisko interpret the Prime Directive and then snap at Bashir. Sometimes in a crisis Sisko will act like Picard and ask for options, but other times he makes a decision and by god you better get behind it. This was an interesting vehicle to keep Opaka “alive” but with the need for Bajor to elect/find/raise up a new religious leader. It was also good for Bashir to get his hands dirty, both rigging the computer and tackling the commander, in order to explain why an entire colony of prisoners didn’t just get beamed out of one quadrant to another. I’m sure this will be important later, 6 warm and comfortable blankets for this episode.

Favorite Quote from “The Storyteller”:

Quark: Let’s see, two Bajoran synthales, a glass of Gamzian wine, and a Trixian bubble juice for the little lady.

Varis: I’m not a little lady.

(Varis throws the drink in Quark’s face and storms out)

Quark: I’m still charging her for that drink.

So this isn’t quite as good as when Perry gets not one, but two drinks thrown in his face in MOONSTRUCK, but I’ll take it.

So what had happened in “The Storyteller” was…: This is a tale of two stories that have absolutely nothing to do with one another. Sisko and Kira deal with two parties who need a mediator while O’Brien and Bashir spend some quality time together.

Sisko and Kira meet with the representatives of the Paqu, a young woman named Varis, and the Navot, a middle aged man named Woban. Nog and Jake visit with Varis, though Nog acts more like Raj from The Big Bang Theory at first and he’s all verklempt when trying to talk in from of Varis. Eventually the boys help her to not only know Commander Sisko better but also to make a compromise that will shape her into an effective leader for her people. There’s also a funny bit that involves those three, a bucket, and some oatmeal.

Jake with some oatmeal on his body while Varis looks on in horror.
Odo? Is that you? Poor Odo…

O’Brien and Bashir have the world’s second most awkward shuttle conversation and land on Bajor for what turns out to be a fake emergency. The Sirah of the village is old and near the end of his life, but it’s up to him and him alone to help the people fight off the Dal’Rok that comes once a year. The Sirah musters up the stamina to do it on the fourth of five nights, but he cannot complete his mission so he has O’Brien take over and names him the new Sirah before he dies. Hovath, the old Sirah’s assistant, attacks O’Brien and then explains that he messed up and lost the people’s trust… but it really should be him that is the new Sirah. O’Brien kisses some babies and tries his hand at being Sirah, but thankfully Hovath bails him out and earns the trust of his people.

Little Orphan Annie scene "you'll stay up til this dump shines like the top of the Chrysler building."
Nog had to clear all of the rails and now this, poor Nog.

…”Okay, Juuuuulian”: I loved that Jake and Nog were able to help more than they realize and that they got the “Little Orphan Annie” treatment for their oatmeal stunt. They are typical mallrats who only have so many places they can go and things that take up their day, so they find the best place to people watch and to think. Odo, of course, does his best to keep them out of trouble… but teenagers will always get themselves into trouble. Their part of the story resonated with me because it can certainly be jarring for a young woman to suddenly be thrust into a situation and then judged for her age. She also has no support structure, from what we can tell, and that’s got to be hard. It was nice to see that she took some time to be a kid for a bit before she had to go rule for her people.

The scene from BLUES BROTHERS where one brother comes out in shaving cream
Not the Puffball Bacteria!

The other part of the story was just stupid, so so so so stupid. If the villagers really fell for this year after year, I just have no words for that level of stupidity. It’s not quite the scary smoke monster from Lost, it’s more like the shaving cream mess from The Blues Brothers 2000. It was fun to see O’Brien thrust into the spotlight and for him futz over the words when presented with three beautiful women, but leave the poor man alone. He just wants to do his job and head back home to Molly and Keiko. Bashir was actually not terrible in this episode, as he’s clearly having a lot of fun at O’Brien’s expense while also trying to get to know the man. He also helps Hovath summon the courage to lead his people and then smartly suggests to O’Brien they get the hell out of dodge. I was also quite fond of the way O’Brien enunciated “Julian” every time he said it, mostly so he could go back to calling him “sir”. I’m going with 4 blankets on this episode, but none of them have dragons on them.

TA Out!

Published by njdevil12

I'm just a big city girl living in a not so big city with my fur children and partner.

2 thoughts on “DS9: “Battle Lines” and “The Storyteller”

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