DS9: “Emissary: Parts 1 & 2”

Date: June 5, 2020

Season 1, Episode 1

Musical Accompaniment: Man of Steel soundtrack by Hans Zimmer

Interstellar News: First, I want to wish a very Happy 34th Birthday to my husband. We purposefully planned to start DS9 today as it’s his favorite of all the Treks. Second, as of today, I have watched 225 hours and 33 minutes of Star Trek. That is 287 episodes, where movies count as one episode, for a grand total of 9 and a half days of my life. I also made an update to the Watch Order and spreadsheet.

I am also introducing a few new categories: “So what had happened was…” will be a quick summary of the episode, “…and then I found five dollars:” will be my thoughts on the episode that aren’t included in the summary. There will be others for favorite quotes by individuals. So far I have these three: Sly, Snarky, and Sage Sisko, O’Brien’s Ordeals, Kick-ass Kira, and Dax, She’s Too Old For You Bro.

Favorite Quotes:

Gul Dukat : Allow me to assure you that we only want to be helpful in this difficult transition. You’re far from the Federation fleet, alone in this remote outpost, with poor defense systems. Your Cardassian neighbors will be quick to respond to any problems you might have.

Sisko: We’ll try to keep the dog off your lawn.

Sassy Sisko is sassy.

Sly, Snarky, and Sage Sisko: “Each day affects the next.” and “It is the unknown that defines our existence.”

So what had happened was…: We open with the events of “The Best of Both Worlds” from First Officer Benjamin Sisko’s point of view on the Saratoga, where he is able to rescue his son Jacob but loses his wife Jennifer. Three years later he’s tasked to be the Starfleet representative on the former Cardassian station, Deep Space Nine, which is close to Bajor. O’Brien will be his Chief of Operations, but several new faces are introduced. Major Kira is a Bajoran and the First Officer, Odo is a shape-shifter and head of security, Quark is a Ferengi who operates a bar and gambling facility, Lieutenant Dax is a Trill and will be at the science station, and Dr. Bashir will be the Chief Medical Officer.

The cast of Deep Space Nine, including Worf, Dax, Bashier, Quark, O'Brien, Odo, Sisko, Jake, and Kira.
I know Worf won’t be here for a while, I miss him already…

The station is a mess but Sisko needs to meet with Picard, which is awkward. After the meeting Sisko uses his knowledge of Ferengi plea bargaining to get Quark to stay and run the Promenade as people will need a place to blow off some steam after work. Sisko also meets with Kai Opaka, a Bajoran spiritual leader, and she shows him the Orbs and tasks him with finding the Celestial Temple. After the Enterprise leaves, a Cardassian ship arrives and Gul Dukat comes aboard, his men gamble, and they leave. Dax and Sisko take a shuttle craft through a wormhole that isn’t like one they’ve ever seen, it’s been constructed, and it takes them to the Gamma quadrant. Dax is sent back to DS9 but Sisko stays and attempts to communicate with the entities who live in the wormhole.

Danny Ocean "I only lied about being a thief, I don't do that anymore"
When Quark introduces himself and is accused of being a thief, I immediately thought of this.

O’Brien is tasked with moving the station so they can lay claim on the wormhole. Dukat’s ship enters the wormhole and the other Cardassians do not believe Kira that it exists, so they engage in an attack. Meanwhile, Sisko is trying to explain linear time to the aliens he’s encountered and realizes he never learned how to live without his wife and he’s been carrying around his grief and anger for too long. The wormhole opens back up and Sisko’s ship is helping Dukat’s out, which allows an end to the battle, and the entities within allow Sisko to use the wormhole.

…and then I found five dollars: So we already had an episode in TNG called “The Emissary“, where we meet my beloved K’Ehleyr, what is this mess of reusing an old title? Is this like “THE Ohio State University”, sigh. Also, WHY ARE THERE NO BRAS IN SPACE?! At several points in the episode I uttered “fucking Cardassians”, then looked at my husband and asked if I’m going to say that a lot… he said “yes”.

An image of a male Cardassian from the neck up.
shakes fist…

As this is a new show and season, I watched the credits… nothing super exciting. I think this was a good episode that introduced everyone in the cast as well as could be expected given the number of people. Picard and O’Brien have their cutesy goodbye. Picard doesn’t steal the show in any way and O’Brien gets to have his try at 20th century technology hacks on 24th century equipment (when he kicks the transporter like you would an old CRT television to get it to work). We get to see Odo being super useful and good at his job, a Black man raising his son alone and being in charge of nothing that turns into an important something, and a Bajoran woman who is feisty as hell and I can already tell loyal to her cause and her people. This will be a huge departure from the previous Treks, but as I enjoyed Babylon 5 I think I will come to like this as well. For a first, and double, episode… I’m setting this a 6 pieces of cake, of an unusual size.

TA Out!

Star Trek Generations

Date: June 4, 2020

Musical Accompaniment: Top 40 Guitar Covers, 2020 edition

Luis-style Summary: The Enterprise-B is going on it’s shakedown cruise with the press, a skeleton crew, no tractor beam, a captain who is the world’s most famous sidekick, Sulu’s kid at the helm, and three special guests: Kirk, Scotty, and Chekov. They receive a distress call and Kirk is acting like a father who is taking their child for their first driving lesson. There’s a spatial distortion that blows up one ship, no survivors, and then the other, though 47 are saved by Scotty. One of the survivors is Guinan and one is a man named Soran… this will become important later. A piece of the ship goes missing and, of course, it contained Kirk.

Data, Worf, Riker, Picard, Troi, and some red shirt on the bridge, still in their naval uniforms, except for whoever was at the conn
This looks like the start of a bad movie… oh wait.

Fast forward 78 years later and Worf is being promoted in a ridiculous holodeck ceremony where Picard is living out his Naval fantasy. Picard gets some bad news (his brother and nephew are dead) and then the Enterprise-D gets a distress call (Romulans attacked an observatory). Guinan is tending bar in Ten-Forward and Soran, who was found on the observatory, is all distressed as he needs to get back right now, damn it Picard. Data has La Forge install his emotion chip and it’s a doozy to get used to, unfortunately leading to La Forge’s capture as Soran has them both beamed to a Klingon ship with B’Etor and Lursa.

Soran is looking for “The Nexus”, is blowing up stars to try to get there, and is using the Duras sisters with the lure of a weapon. The sisters find a way to fire on the Enterprise but are outsmarted by Worf and get themselves blown up for their trouble. Picard is on planet with Soran and is trying to stop him, which means Riker is in charge of the ship. Naturally, as Riker is in charge, they have to evacuate everyone to the saucer section and then crash land on the planet in dramatic Hollywood fashion.

The Enterprise D, crash landed with it's trail behind it
Now that’s what I call a crash landing… and also why RIKER IS NEVER TO BE LEFT IN CHARGE!

Picard and Soran fight like the old men they are when The Nexus envelopes the planet and suddenly Picard is married to random redhead woman #5 with several children and René is alive and they’re all celebrating Christmas. Guinan enters the vision and nudges him along to find Kirk, who thinks it’s nine years ago and he has the chance to “do it all right” with a woman he left to rejoin Starfleet. After riding on horses, because honestly who doesn’t own their own saddle, Kirk decides to join Picard to right what Soran did wrong. They beat up Soren, Kirk dies, the Enterprise-D is successfully evacuated, Data finds Spot, and Picard tosses a priceless relic aside for a family photo album.

TL;DR: Kirk is lost in space and 78 years later he’s found by Picard, who also gets sucked into this thing called “The Nexus” because of a man named Soran. Picard and Kirk work together to kick Soran’s ass and it’s all made possible because of temporal distortions and energy ribbons. Oh, and Data has his emotion chip installed and the Enterprise-D is totaled.

Favorite quotes:

Kirk: Take us out.

Chekov: Very good, sir.

Scotty: Brought a tear to my eye.

Kirk: Oh, be quiet.

I missed the hell out of Chekov and Scotty, and maybe Kirk… but just a bit.

Captain James T. Kirk: “You know if Spock were here, he’d say I was an irrational, illogical human being for taking on a mission like that. Sounds like fun.”

Guinan: It looks like he hates it.

Data: Yes. That is it. I hate this.

La Forge: Data, I think the chip is working.

Data: Yes. I hate this! It is revolting!

Guinan: More?

Data: Please.

Data is the most adorable android.

My Thoughts and Impressions: So this movie basically boiled down to “The Kirk and Picard Show” and I am not here for it. Rather than spoil it all right at the beginning, let me take you through some random thoughts I had throughout the movie.

Why wasn’t it funny for Data to push Crusher into the water? I thought it was hysterical and was spontaneous for Data. I just don’t understand how that is the catalyst for him using the chip… and also, how was the chip restored? It was damaged in “Descent“.

The Enterprise D, crash landed with it's trail behind it. Yes, I put the same image twice in the same post.
If I had to watch it twice, you’re going to see it twice. Also, don’t give Riker the keys.

Why did we see the saucer crash not once, but twice? It is just a Hollywood thing, getting their money’s worth out of the shot? I mean it’s not as bad as the shot from The Motion Picture, you know which one I’m talking about. I’m also pretty sure there’s the scene where both captains are riding horses because, well, somehow they both love horses and why not? Got to make the old guys happy somehow.

I also have no idea why Picard chose that particular moment to return to. What about in Ten-Forward, before Soran leaves the Enterprise-D or even when he’s still on the observatory? I get that it’s for the drama, but maybe they could have explained he could only go back to a time where the Nexus and he were closest? Is this why Guinan has spidey-senses when something has fucked with the space-time continuum? I really needed more Guinan in my life, and she was no where to be found in Season 7, sigh.

Kirk and Picard riding their horses
You like horses? Yeah. Me too! DID WE JUST BECOME BEST FRIENDS?!

I was sad that Kirk died, but it was the way I always imagined he would die… on one last mission. He explains to Harriman that “risk is part of the game if you want to sit in the chair” and he fucking loved that captain’s chair. I hated that we only got 5 minutes of Chekov and Scotty, none of Uhura, and only a brief mention of Sulu. I’m okay with not getting any of McCoy, he showed up on TNG at least, and there was no reason for Spock to be there with his ambassador duties. It was a fitting end to the OG Enterprise crew.

I also came to the realization, while writing this post, that Picard is vaguely like Leroy Jethro Gibbs. A fascination with redheaded women, married to the job, has a favorite drink (tea, Early Gray, hot vs. coffee, so sue me), and is a law and order kind of man. SO there are obviously a lot of differences, but those kind of struck me tonight.

I will end with the following: NEVER LET RIKER HAVE COMMAND OF THE SHIP.

Movie rating: In comparison to the other movies on my Rankings page, it would earn itself a warp 6.3, but this is only because I rate it higher than The Motion Picture (6) and lower than The Undiscovered Country (6.5). If I were to rate it independently, it’s a warp 3… so I absolutely need to go back and fix my old posts. I won’t, but I should.

TA Out!

TNG Finale: “All Good Things…”

Date: June 3, 2020

Season 7, Episode 25

Musical Accompaniment: Star Trek in concert, from Prague 2016

Interstellar News: Summer has arrived in the South. Also, we watched the credits one last time.

Favorite Quotes:

Worf’s One-Two Punch: “It was…… very stimulating.”

Picard’s Poetry: “I prefer to look on the future as something which is not written in stone.”

Data’s Not Really An Android: “I found that a touch of grey adds an air of distinction.”

Riker is a Raconteur: “A face off. The question is, who’s going to move first?”

Quick Summary: Worf and Troi have a holodeck date and just as they are about to kiss Picard comes running up to them in his Big Lebowski finest and explains he’s moving through time. At various points through the episode we deal with Past, Current, and Future Picard.

The Dude from The Big Lebowski in the grocery store
The Dude abides.

The future is about 25 years from current time where Picard is tending to his grapes and has Irumodic Syndrome. La Forge, minus VISOR but add wife and kids, comes to visit and they then travel to visit Data in Cambridge where he is a professor and a crazy cat android. They decide they need a ship, which Admiral Riker denies, but the other Captain Picard (first name Beverly) allows them to tag along. They also find Governor Worf, the most honorable Klingon in politics, who goes with them to try and smooth things over as the Klingons took over the Romulan Empire and parted ways with the Federation. Troi is, apparently, dead and it caused a rift between Riker and Worf. They arrive where the anomaly should be but are attacked by Klingons and then saved by Riker and the Enterprise.

Future La Forge, Picard, Crusher-Picard, and Data
I wonder if this is how the cast will look in Picard

The past begins on the shuttle craft that takes him to the Enterprise for the first time with Tasha Yar as his pilot. They are on their way to Farpoint Station, are ordered to The Neutral Zone, but Picard ignores that orders and goes looking for the first time he met Q. Eventually he is back in front of Judge Q who plays “10 questions” with Picard and proclaims Picard has doomed humanity.

"The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense." There is a llama in the background, no idea why.
Sorry kids, I had to do it.

In the present Crusher begins with a scan but there’s communication from Admiral Nakamura that wants to send them to The Neutral Zone because… Romulans. The scan shows a defect and it’s serious enough that lead to Crusher and Picard having a tender moment. At the edge of TNZ Picard hails the Romulan warbird and he and Tomolak agree to each send one ship in to investigate the anomaly. La Forge’s eyes begin to heal and Nurse Ogawa loses her baby because of anti-time. After a lot of back and forth and a bit of nudging from Q, Picard realizes the tachyon pulses are what caused the anomaly. He eventually orders all three ships to enter the anomaly, at which point they all see each other, and one-by-one they explode. Present Picard is then back with just Q in the judge’s chambers where Q explains he’s done well and all of a sudden Picard is back to interrupting Worf and Troi. The episode ends with Picard joining the senior staff for poker night.

My Thoughts and Impressions: When Picard is first in the future and sees people jeering at him, I thought it was weird but was sure I’d find out more soon. The second time it happened I said to my husband “weird, those totally look like the people from the first episode when Q put them on trial”, and he gave a noncommittal shrug. When Q finally reveals himself, I shot my husband a look… I’m sure you know the one.

A woman with her eyes squinted
Yup, this look.

I really enjoyed seeing how the episode came together. In the past you see how the crew must have felt when Jellico took command, as Picard acts just like Jellico did. Picard makes use of his future knowledge to bring everyone to his side eventually, because he’s Jean-Luc Picard, damn it! In the future, you see how much everyone changed and still kind of stayed the same in some respects. I was thrilled to see Crusher became a captain, sad that Troi died, creeped out that La Forge may have married Leah Brahms, happy that Worf was living his best Klingon life, ecstatic that Data turned into me (a professor with a lot of cats), and not surprised that Riker turned into a jerk when he became an admiral. It was great to see how they got the band back together, it flowed in all the right ways. In the present, and I can’t say it enough, WE NEEDED MORE TOMOLAK! Q is at his best here when he takes Picard back in time to where the first amino acids bumped uglies, because he really has developed a soft spot for Picard and humanity. Q knows deep down that Picard will always make the hard choice, even if it means sacrificing himself and his crew in three different timelines. It was also wonderful that the timelines did not effect one another, it actually made a lot of sense to me.

Robin Williams in Jumanji "what year is it"
Seriously, how is 2020 half way through?

After the mishegoss that was the last two series finales, TOS and TAS, I was so glad that this was everything I wanted it to be. There are callbacks to just enough things, a bit of the show calling itself out, and enough science fiction and Q continuum foolishness to bring us full circle on this journey and not feel like it was all for nothing. The present day crew has their futures ahead of them because that future no longer exists and, the sky is truly the limit for them. I know I’ll see the crew in some movies and Picard (if I ever get there), but I’m excited for some new faces and a different setting for a while. That’s a wrap at warp 9 for me. Tomorrow, we’ll tackle Generations.

TA Out!

TNG: “Bloodlines”, “Emergence”, and “Preemptive Strike”

Date: June 2, 2020

Season 7, Episodes 22, 23, and 24

Musical Accompaniment: Back to my iTunes mix with all the Warped Tour compilation albums, Maroon 5, Billy Joel, Linkin Park, and a few movie soundtracks.

Interstellar News: Yesterday, when I watched these episodes, I completed five loads of laundry and today we watched five episodes of Scrubs.

Favorite Quote from “Bloodlines”:

Bok: How touching. Your apology is worthless to me. I demand that you repay me for my loss.

Picard: You cannot put a price on a life.

Bok remembering he’s a Ferengi and Picard being, well, Picard.

“Bloodlines” begins with the Enterprise intercepting a probe that shows a hologram message from Bok (last seen in “The Battle“) proclaiming that “Jason Vigo is as good as dead”. Jason might be Picard’s son and Bok is still out for revenge, so they head to Camor V and beam up Jason. Turns out his mom died but Crusher’s DNA test says they’re a match. Jason is no angel and also has no interest in getting to know Picard, but Picard is determined to be there for his son and to protect him from Bok. Jason has a seizure, Crusher finds out his has a rare disorder, but then Bok transports Jason off of the ship. Picard follows and explains to the others on board that Bok lied to them, there is no profit, and Jason isn’t actually his son because Bok faked the DNA test. Bok is arrested by the other Ferengi, Jason heads back to Camor V, and Picard promises to visit sometime.

Jason Vigo in his red vest
Jason with his nifty red vest.

Apparently Season 7 has turned into “let’s have a lot of sad episodes and also have all the bridge crew take a turn at being parents”. Crusher and Worf we’ve seen, Troi was a parent in “The Child” and in some alternate realities, Riker in “Future Imperfect“, Data in “The Offspring“, and now Picard sort of gets his turn. Picard does all the right moves but he does it without much feeling, he’s just suuuuuper awkward. Jason plays the “mad at his dad that was never there” kind of low key and I don’t really buy either of their performances. There are some great lines between the two, like where Picard tells Jason it doesn’t matter about his criminal activities and they end joking about hairlines.

Gollum says "the bald and the beautiful"
My precious… hair!

Bok is another one who is off in some way. In “The Battle”, you can tell he’s grieving and just a bit crazy. Here, Bok’s just meh, I don’t find him as compelling as a victim and the danger never seems real. The subspace transporter thing just seems to show up when needed and also doesn’t actually pose any of the threat we’re warned about. I also don’t understand why Bok mutated Jason’s genes, because if Picard ever found out (like he did) then it would just be some random person that Bok killed. I wish he had played it a little more crazy instead of the “aw shucks you caught me”. I was also a bit confused at first why there were other Ferengi on board and felt it was super in character for them to switch sides as soon as they realized there was no profit. This episode felt, just like the last few, like it could have been so much better. At least it got the parts right about being a supportive parental figure no matter what, 5 cheers for Jason and Picard.

Favorite Quote from “Emergence”:

Data: The object could have been dangerous. It may in fact, be dangerous.

Picard: And I have allowed it to go off on its merry way.

Data: Yes, sir.

Picard: The intelligence that was formed on the Enterprise didn’t just come out of the ship’s systems. It came from us.

Here’s the thing: you’re never going to know how something will turn out. The best you can do is nurture the fuck out of it and hope for the best.

“Emergence” begins with Data and Picard on the holodeck when there’s a malfunction. Later the Enterprise goes to warp speed and then stops without an order either time, though an investigation reveals they would have blown up if they didn’t move just then, curiouser and curiouser. Data and La Forge find a new node and then several others around the ship, they are strikingly similar to Data’s neural net. Worf, Riker, and Data head to the holodeck where a train program is running along with several others, but they don’t have any tickets so they leave after the engineer gets shot.

Silent Bob in DOGMA "no ticket"
I do love me some Dogma.

This time Troi goes with Worf and Data into the train where they follow a man with a brick. They realize things are happening to the ship when something happens in the holodeck and that the ship is creating something and needs more vertion particles. Picard and La Forge come up with a plan to create artificial ones, which works, and the object comes to life and flies away. Data laments that it might be bad, how do they know how it’s going to turn out? Picard gives some bullshit about how the Enterprise is made up of good people and I’m sitting here staring in horror thinking about Barclay’s holodeck fantasies and Moriarty.

Flexible, colorful bendy straws
This was my first thought at what “the node” looked like.

When Data and La Forge are traversing the Jeffries tubes, for the upteenth time, I realized that anytime people were crawling through the tubes and talking it felt a bit like The West Wing in space. I guess since Season 7 is wrapping everything up there had to be just one last holodeck malfunction, just to bring closure to those of us who clearly didn’t get enough the first several times. This could have been awesome if the crew was able to interact with the computer, but I guess the train concept was okay too. It would have been nice if there was a callback to the times we have seen the holodeck in use, like maybe one of the bad guys from Worf’s calisthenics program or something from one of Barclay’s programs. When I read the teaser (The Enterprise’s computer is showing signs of sentience) I proclaimed “If Majel Barrett herself doesn’t materialize on the bridge, I’m not interested” and I wasn’t wrong. No one seemed to give two flying fucks that their ship was CREATING LIFE, they all treated it like it’s a daily occurrence their star ship flips out and decides it wants to be a parent. Then the thing flies out into space and no one is worried in the slightest, except for Data. Oh there were parts I thought were funny, but most of this episode was a big fat flub. 3 sausage links for this episode, mild and made with tofu or something equally as gross.

Lt. Ro showing up for her welcome party
Clearly the look of someone who is overwhelmed.

“Preemptive Strike” sees the return of Lieutenant Ro, last seen in “Rascals” as a little kid and Ensign. The Enterprise is in the DMZ and defends a Cardassian ship from an attack by the rebel group known as a Maquis. Admiral Nechayev is back and wants to send Ro undercover to infiltrate the Maquis. Ro shows she has an aptitude for undercover work and gets in with the Maquis, especially after she steals medical supplies from the Enterprise. Picard wants to lay a trap and Ro is apprehensive, but understands the mission. Macius, the leader of the Maquis cell, is killed by some Cardassians and Ro starts to get cold feet, so Picard sends Riker along. Just as the Maquis are able to cross the border, Ro betrays the Federation and beams away to be with the Maquis… though she leaves Riker alone and with a message for Picard.

Riker and Ro in the shuttlecraft, her holding a phaser to him
“Hey, Ro. Whatcha gonna do with that thing?”

I really liked the character of Ro and, although I hate the decision she made it’s totally in character for her. She finally found a place she belonged and it’s hardest on Picard because it’s yet another young person he trained to drink the Starfleet Kool-Aid that just didn’t want it (I’m talking about Wes, in case anyone missed that). There wasn’t much dialog that stood out for me in this episode, hence the lack of quote, and it was mostly just there. You can see what’s happening before it happens but there’s still hope that Ro will be on the side of the Federation because they’re the good guys, right? It does prove a good point that when one group makes a decision that effects others, it doesn’t always turn out all roses and such. Listening to what happened to Macius and known what happened to Ro’s father makes her defection not so surprising, but she latched on to him much quicker than she did to Picard. Yet there’s still the guilt of what Picard did for her to even get to that place, she might still be in prison if not for him. As with the other two episodes I watched, I wish this was better… but it wasn’t awful. A phaser on setting 6 for this one.

Tomorrow we’ll end Season 7 and The Next Generation, Thursday we’ll watch Generations, and then Friday will be the start of Deep Space 9.

TA Out!

A Second Challenge

Date: June 1, 2020

Musical Accompaniment: A random assortment of things on my “watch later” list.

Interstellar News: I did watch three episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation today, but it’s 11:30 pm and I need to get some sleep. I promise I will write about them tomorrow.

I will also be challenging myself in a second way and wanted to keep you all updated.

One of my favorite authors, Laurell K. Hamilton, is about to release her 27th Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter novel, Sucker Punch, in August. It’s been two years since the last release, and I always try to do a re-read before the next book comes out. I figure I’ll need the next two months to get through the reading (between watching episodes of Trek and work and such).

So tonight, before bed, I will begin with Guilty Pleasures.

Laurell K. Hamilton's "Guilty Pleasures" novel cover
The bookmark comes from my favorite game series, Munchkin, but more specifically their Vampire themed set. Tis appropriate.

TA Out!