TNG: “The Battle” and “Hide and Q”

Date: February 27, 2020

Season 1, Episodes 8 and 9

Setting the Stage: I watched the first episode on Tuesday and the second episode on Wednesday. Wednesday was a loooooong day of workshop, lunch meeting, office hours, teaching, being a faculty advisor, and then a dinner meeting. Obviously Professor Zoom was in my lap for the whole episode. I’m still watching on Netflix, though both yesterday and today it recommend Deep Space Nine instead. Clearly they are not respecting the order, though at least DS9 is after TNG, so there’s that. Today’s writing music is more Star Wars instrumental, because I love mixing fandoms in my life. Party on dudes!

I also want to keep plugging the Kickstarter Bad Ass Moms for a few more days because it’s a really cool project and there are SO MANY BUNDLES. I mean look at ALL THE BUNDLES: http://kck.st/2SimbnD

Favorite Quote from “The Battle”:

Bok: We have heard that you use females. Clothed females. Most interesting.

Riker: They are that, sir.

Kazago: And the android was mentioned too. What is its price? We should like to purchase it.

Picard: He is not for sale. Commander Data is, um, is, um…

Riker: Is second-hand merchandise. You wouldn’t want him.

Data: Second-hand, sir? Oh, of course. A human joke.

The Ferengi being their usual strange selves and Riker quick with the sass. It also reminds me of a great scene from Blues Brothers

“The Battle” begins with the Enterprise and a Ferengi vessel meeting, at the behest of the Ferengi no less, but they’ve been radio silent for three days. Picard is suffering from a headache which is apparently not something that is common anymore. Three Ferengi beam aboard as Picard’s old ship, the Stargazer is brought to them in order to honor the “Hero of Maxia”. Years ago an unidentified vessel, which we are now told was a Ferengi ship, refused to open communications and fired on the Stargazer and Picard was adept enough to have a maneuver named after him. The Ferengi are offering the vessel for free and out of “friendship”, they are much more controlled this episode and much less monkey-like than the last time we saw them.

Turns out one of the Ferengi is doing something to Picard’s mind. Data uncovers a recording of Picard “admitting” to shooting first without provocation, but that’s found out to be a fake. Picard is tricked into setting the Stargazer free from the tractor beam and then he beams aboard and is met by Bok. Bok’s only son was on that unidentified vessel from 9 years ago and Bok has been planning his revenge. Bok leaves the mind control sphere and beams off, just as Picard thinks he’s back trying to fight the enemy ship, when really he’s thinking about firing on the Enterprise. The other Ferengi report to Riker that they don’t want to be involved, but they have relieved Bok of his command. Riker helps Picard to destroy the sphere and we get to see Picard’s stunt double before everyone walks away as if nothing had happened.

I enjoyed this episode for the roller coaster it was. Wes comes up with a way to do something that Data seems interested in but he also gets a dressing down from Picard, and rightly so. Dr. Crusher is concerned about “just a headache” because she understands the implications. The crew that explores the Stargazer are like kids who have discovered an old GameBoy while Picard is reminiscent and thinking of his old ship fondly, or as much as he can with his head being toyed with. The other Ferengi stay true to their character by putting profit above all else, but show a little bit more when they give Riker the heads up about it, as if to say “we’re not really all that bad, and we’re also a bit sorry our captain was an idiot”. All in all a solid episode with only a few down spots, so that earns this episode an 8 piece band.

Favorite Quote from “Hide and Q”:

Data: Sir, how is it that the Q can handle time and space so well, and us so badly?

Picard: Perhaps some day we will discover that space and time are simpler than the human equation.

Picard with the ever amazing answers

“Hide and Q” sees the Enterprise heading toward a medical emergency when Q interferes, no matter how many times they explain they are trying to help others. Q takes everyone but Picard off the bridge and onto a class M planet with twin moons while Picard is left on the Enterprise alone, that is until Yar is put in “the penalty box”. The Q are intrigued by humans, but Q wants to focus on Riker this time. Picard and Q make a wager and suddenly the whole bridge is on the planet and are under attack. Worf gets owned, Wesley gets stabbed, and Riker has been given the power of the Q, so he fixes everyone and beams them back with a smug expression on his face. Picard makes Riker promise not to give in to the power of the Q.

Now at the medical emergency they find a dead child, but Riker keeps his promise (though he doesn’t like it). Q, who likes to change costumes frequently and does so enough that Picard even mentions it, shows up to tempt Riker. Riker starts to give everyone on the bridge the things they want most: Wesley to be 10 years older, Data wants to be human, Worf wants a Klingon female, and La Forge his sight – but they all refuse, they know the cost is too high. Riker understands what a fool he was, as Picard knew he would, and refuses the power. This means Q loses the bet and is whisked away.

I really want them to use Worf more often, I am so intrigued by him. When he gets his drink from Q he makes amazing eye contact, purposefully empties the drink, and throws away the glass, all while growling menacingly at Q… it’s fantastic. Also, I’m pretty sure Worf admits to being both kinky (he does slap the female Klingon) and either asexual or possibly purposefully celibate (“This is sex. But I have no place for it in my life now.”) in this episode and I’m living for all of it.

It’s great that Riker knows what everyone’s deepest desire is, you can only know that if you spend time getting to know those under your command. It takes him a while and a lot of nudging by Picard, but he eventually gets there. However, there’s a lot of beaming back and forth, Yar is almost completely forgotten, and the guy who plays Riker just can’t banter with the best of them like Sir Patrick Stewart. This episode earns a 6 dollar foot-long, take that Subway!

TA Out!